Today the baby...

...weighs as much as a turnip

Happy Birthday Jeremy!

Saturday was Jeremy's birthday. We had big plans to go out and celebrate together last Thursday but since I can't leave the bed that had to be canceled, sadly. Jeremy's parents came over Friday evening and brought dinner and a birthday cake for him. I'm so thankful they did...otherwise, he would hardly have been celebrated at all. I'm thankful his love language is not gifts or we'd be in trouble. Instead of serving and loving on him for his birthday, he has been doing that for me and the rest of his family. He has really turned into Mr. Mom this week and he's doing an outstanding job! I'm so thankful for a competent husband who can bare so much and is steady and strong! He is a blessing to me and I'm thankful for him. Happy Birthday Babe, let's have a rain check on that birthday celebration:)

to hold him fast

I was reading "Knowing God" by J.I. Packer the other day and was so encouraged by this portion about grace. Packer says, "This is what all the work of grace aims at - an ever deeper knowledge of God, and an ever closer fellowship with him. Grace is God drawing us sinners closer and closer to himself. How does God in grace prosecute this purpose? Not by shielding us from assault by the world, the flesh and the devil, nor by protecting us from burdensome and frustrating circumstances, nor yet by shielding us from troubles created by our own temperament and psychology; but rather by exposing us to all these things, so as to overwhelm us with a sense of our own inadequacy, and to drive us to cling to him more closely. This is the ultimate reason, from our standpoint, why God fills our lives with troubles and perplexities of one sort and another: it is to ensure that we shall learn to hold him fast."

So I can trust and assume that this is what God is after...he is overwhelming me with a sense of my own inadequacy and driving me to cling more closely to him and ensuring that I learn to hold him fast.

And this is why we can say with James, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." - James 1:2-4

Bed rest

I had my appointment yesterday afternoon with the high risk doctor. The ultrasound tech did a long ultrasound to look at the baby and his surroundings. Everything looked normal and good except for the bloody area from the tear. The tech didn't seem concerned and even said this is common. I was feeling good at this point, thinking that it wasn't a big deal and that everything would be fine. Then I went to another room to wait for the doctor. When he came in he explained more and said he wants to monitor me closely and that he wants me on strict bed rest. After he said those words it was hard to hear anything else he said. I will go back to this doctor next Wednesday and am on bed rest at least until then. We are in shock and a little overwhelmed but also feel strengthened by the Lord as He gives us peace. I am so thankful for the help we've received so far and the help I know will come. We are blessed to be surrounded by loved ones!

Please pray with us that God would bring complete healing to the placenta by the time I go back to the doctor next Wednesday. I would love to hear them say that it is totally gone and completely healed! Pray for our baby to be protected as I heal. Pray for Jeremy especially as his role changes and the demands of family increases for him. Pray for much strength and grace!

Overwhelmed

Today we had another ultrasound to take a closer look at the baby because I've had some off and on spotting this week. This has been yet again a test of my faith as I've had to exercise it! Everything in me wants this to be an easy and fast pregnancy and to just fast forward to February! But I'm trusting God's plans are better than my own and so this is for my good to have to walk by faith daily through this pregnancy.

Thankfully Jeremy was able to come to the appointment with me. We were so relieved to see the heartbeat and the baby move. The ultrasound tech thought that the source of blood was coming from a tear in the placenta. She wasn't too concerned about it but the doctor wants me to go see a high risk doctor tomorrow and to not do anything strenuous. She said they would probably monitor me more closely through this pregnancy. Please pray that the tear would NOT increase and that God would heal this tear and protect the baby. I have been overwhelmed today by the love and prayers and support of family and freinds. I'm so blessed and thankful for people in my life who care and are walking through this with me! Thank you!

There was also a fun part to this ultrasound....we found out that we are having a...

BOY!!!!!

Today

Please continue to pray with us that God would protect and sustain the life of this baby. We are thankful that we got to see the baby today during an ultrasound. The baby was very active and it was neat to watch him/her moving around. We were reassured for today.

Dinosaurs

This week Carson and I have been learning about dinosaurs. One of the things we've done together was listen to a video speech about Dinosaurs and the Bible. This 2 part video is answering the question, "Are Dinosaurs explained in the Bible?" It's been fun to learn more about the creation of dinosaurs and see how they handle the question of what happened to the dinosaurs. You can listen to them here by scrolling down until you see "Dinosaurs and the Bible Part 1 & Part 2."

Today the baby is...

...the size of an apple

College Leadership Retreat

This Thursday evening through Saturday morning was the annual College Leadership Retreat. This year we have a great team of college student leaders coming off of amazing summers serving and growing in the Lord and eager to serve and grow here in Clemson. They are a great group of college students and it was a joy for our family to be around them for parts of the retreat. They all stayed at Rick & Betsy Freeman's house on the lake and it was a perfect place for the retreat! We played on the lake most of the day Friday and they had some meetings as well through the retreat.

I've been reminded lately of the blessing to be around and minster to college students. I really do love this age and I'm so thankful that Jeremy's job as the college pastor at Crosspoint allows us the time to be part of their lives. It's also a blessing for our children. I love knowing that our kids are growing up around such neat role models for them. They see these young adults walking with God and they naturally admire them! What more could we as parents ask for!?

This is an exciting week in our little college town as students roll back into town. Today was Freshmen Move-In Day so Jeremy and Carson went (along with many others from our church) to help freshmen move into their dorms. The girls and I went to Walmart and I got the emotional lump in my throat as I saw families shopping for their son/daughter who was starting college. Just thinking about the emotions they are feeling made me a little sober (granted, some of this could totally be pregnancy hormones). Yet, it's such an exiting time as freshman embark on a new chapter of their life. We hope to see many get plugged into our church where they can grow, serve, and thrive for the next several years here. It's an exciting time around Tiger Town!

Here are some pics from the college leadership retreat:

David had a little accident while tubing and ended up getting 6 stitches!

Today the baby is...

...the size of a lemon

Bedhead

Lydia wakes up with some intense bedhead! I couldn't resist taking her picture this particular morning. I told her she looked like an 80's rock star!

Loss of Innocence

I was reading in my pregnancy book the other day about coping with pregnancy loss and came to this paragraph.....

"A miscarriage often means never again taking for granted that a pregnancy
will lead to a baby. Recognize also that your next pregnancy will be less
innocent. On the one hand, you'll try not to think about the baby too much
for fear that you might miscarry again. On the other hand, you'll be extra
attuned to every pregnancy symptom - twinges, aches, tender breasts - as a sign
that the baby is still thriving."

I have certainly felt that this pregnancy has been "less innocent" and that has been something for me to grieve. I have had the extreme thoughts....not thinking about the baby and not wanting to go to the doctor at all...and then swinging to the other extreme of being consumed with whether or not I "feel pregnant" and wanting to hear the heartbeat all the time...etc. I am fighting, by the grace of God, to not live in either extreme but to walk by faith and wait on Him and to trust His good and perfect plan for the life of this baby. It's a fight though, and that is what can become wearisome and sad. I've not had to "fight" like this during a pregnancy before. Losing a baby changes you. It's very true that "a miscarriage often means never again taking for granted that a pregnancy will lead to a baby." So I don't hope in a baby, I hope in the Lord who is in control and is good!

These verses I am praying....

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 2 Timothy 1:7

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope." Romans 15:13

Thankful & Hopeful

God has been gracious to give us another little life in the womb and we are rejoicing as we wait on Him for this new addition to our family. We went to the doctor today and thankfully heard and saw (thankful for an unexpected ultrasound) the heartbeat. We are hopeful to meet this baby the beginning of February. We feel so blessed to be given this gift. Please pray for us and this little one as we wait.

Happy Birthday Lydia!

Today our sweet Lydia turned 2! It's hard to believe it's been 2 years since we first held her. She is such a joy to our family. Here are some things I love about Lydia at age 2:

I love how she jumps up and down when she gets excited

I love her many expressions, especially when she is unsure about a situation.

I love how she gives sweet hugs and really holds on tight when she hugs.

I love seeing how she adores her brother and sister.

I love seeing her special love and affection reserved for Daddy

I love how she breaks out in song throughout the day

I love when she cuts her eyes to look at me and then breaks with an uncontrollable smile

I love her brown eyes that make me think of my mother and grandmother whenever I look in them

We brought some cupcakes to the park to celebrate with our friends at our weekly play date. She was a little unsure of everyone singing to her. Again, love her facial expressions!

We gave Lydia a little tea set (and a big girl bed in the near future) and she had to work hard to fend off her brother and sister so she could play with it first.

We celebrated as a family tonight

Thank you Father for this sweet gift!

Grandpa & Raggie

While in Virginia, Lydia and I were able to drive to Yorktown to have a short visit with Grandpa and Raggie in the nursing home. We got to eat lunch with them and have a short visit. Grandpa seemed well this day but Raggie was having a hard time. They are now 91 and 92 years old and have many ups and downs between the two of them with their health. My Mom is an amazing daughter to them as she serves them and advocates for them daily! I am encouraged and challenged as I see her love her parents so well during this difficult season. Please pray for comfort and wisdom for them all.

Lydia enjoyed her pb&j sandwich and chocolate milk

Mom helping Raggie with her lunch

Grandpa & I

Raggie is tired a lot and after lunch she was ready for her bed and for us to leave so she could nap. I am so thankful for Grandpa and Raggie and all the treasured memories I have with them. They will be so missed (and already are in many ways) when they are no longer with us. They are amazing people!

Week at the Lake

We just got back home after a week at the lake cottage on Lake Gaston. We are so thankful for a great place to go and vacate and also see family! It was a fun-filled week! Here are some of my favorite pictures from the week.

Jeremy with his girls

Bryn has the right idea

Uncle Bryan throwing the boys

the girls

Ainsley & Bryn hang pretty close when they are together

the girls zonked out on me

Ainsley & Andrea

Michael driving the boat

Grammy with Carson & Bryn on the kayak

One of the highlights of the week was watching Carson ride the kayak all by himself. It was so fun watching him! He did such a great job!

they love their Grammy

Lydia driving the boat. I love this facial expression...classic Lydia face

Bryn driving the boat

Carson driving the boat

Lydia turns 2 on Tuesday so we celebrated her birthday our last night there.

blowing out her candles


she got her very own trike from Grandpa & Grammy and she loves it!